


Two People Talking... Blair Sandburg and Miss Piggy

by Sally M (sallymn)



Series: Two People Talking... [19]
Category: The Muppet Show, The Sentinel
Genre: Crack, Crossover, Gen, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-03
Updated: 2016-07-03
Packaged: 2018-07-19 19:02:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 320
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7373716
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sallymn/pseuds/Sally%20M
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A short dialogue piece... simply because :)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Two People Talking... Blair Sandburg and Miss Piggy

**Two People Talking... Blair Sandburg and Miss Piggy**

"Oh man, this is _not_ gonna work." 

"Of _course_ it will, Blair dearest, I'll just dazzle them with -" 

"We already tried that, remember? Now I'm looking at the New Year in the lockup, and _you'll_ be in a pen." 

"A what?" 

"A pen, Miss Piggy. A pig pen. Or playing a starring Christmas role as a ham." 

"Why you little - HIIIYYYAA -" 

"Hey hey, _hey_! Cool it, I didn't say that, the cop you karate-chopped did!!" 

{sniff} "He asked for it, _mon cher_." 

"Oh man, we need a plan and fast. Let me think..." 

"MmmmmMMM... I do _loooooovvve_ a man with a plan." 

"Sorry Piggy, you're so not my type, I'm Jewish." {silence} "So they're looking for a 5-foot-9 man with long hair and glasses -" 

"A _magnificent_ 5-foot-9 man, grrrr...." 

"- And a 2-foot... something pig in a blond wig." 

"Wig?" 

"Okay, okay, a _dead-sexy_ 2-foot... something pig in a gorgeous blonde wig." 

"WIG???" 

"Hey, their words not - ow! Stop hitting me, or I'll surrender and you can take your chances at the Farmers Co-op!!" 

"I take back that 'gorgeous', you _weeeiiirrddddd_ twit turkey human!" 

"What we need are disguises." 

{longer silence} "What?" 

"We need to look like someone else. They're looking for a human and a pig... both with hair." 

"Yes!!!" 

"Forget it, Piggy, I am _not_ cutting my hair!" 

"Ooooh, kissy kissy?" 

"No way! Though..." 

"What? What?" {scuffling-in-backpack noises} "What are you looking for?" 

"Your emerald lame evening -" 

"Not likely, buster!" 

"Piggy, they're looking for a man and a beautiful pig, not a man and a.... beautiful.... frog." 

"I won't! I won't! I -" 

"Do it for your Kermie." 

{dead silence} 

"You too then, buster." 

"I - what???" 

"The _gendarmerie_ won't be looking for two frogs, will they?" 

"You have to be joking, they'll never fall for..." 

"Do it or die, _mon cher_... and just think how dazzling you'll look in flippers..." 

  


**\- the end -**

**Author's Note:**

> (Written for a dialogue challenge)


End file.
